Amatuer Otaku
by SayonaraAoiSora
Summary: You're a writer for fanfiction. The Naruto gang doesn't like this very much, so they decide to take matters into their own hands. What will happen to you now? Crappy summery, I know. ;A;
1. Daily Life

Twenty-seven hours.

That was the amount of time you had been awake, laying in bed, writing this damn story for your e-friend._ 'A lemon,'_ you thought bitterly, _'Of all the things she would desire for her birthday, of all the crap that she could've weaseled out of me, the broad picks a lemon.'_ Your friend, whose name that shan't be mentioned, was a Narutard. A hopeless, anime-boy crazy Narutard. You loved her though, and you even had a feeling she would want a story from you. Sure, you never expected her to be so foreword in saying 'give me sexy smut to read' before she blew out the candles of her birthday cake, but it's not like that idea had not crossed your mind. You never particularly liked writing lemons, mainly because you've never experienced 'that wonderful thing', and you figured she would know that by now.

That being said, you could not deny your best friend's birthday wish, now could you? So, now, here you are, laying in bed with the computer on your tummy and your eyes crusting shut from the miniature naps you've taken along the way. The whole twenty-something hours had not been spent on just writing; some of it was spent on research, changing the underwear you had on- for obvious reasons -and eating to refuel the lost energy. It was not that you were a bad writer-you weren't 'awesome', but your work was good enough to be tolerated and given compliments-oh, gosh no. It was the simple fact that you were a person that liked to experience what you wrote about, because that was what made all your works good.

With a huff, you placed your arms at your sides and read aloud the little work you had done for the passed hour or two.

"Sasuke looked deep into her eyes, his grip on her wrists increasing. 'Say it,' he whispered to her, 'Tell me what you want.' The body below him struggled to escape his grasp only to be kept in the same place. 'Get off!' she spat, 'I.. I hate you, get off me, Uchiha!' His mouth twitched into a sly smile as his face inched closer to hers. His hot breath pouring over her skin, he moved his lips to her ear.  
>'You're a dirty liar.'"<p>

So far, it sounded alright, there did not seem to be anything much wrong with the little passage. Well, beside the fact that you felt like a dirty pervert for putting those words down in that order, but you would happily trade your integrity in for friendship.

_'...I knew I should've stayed a loner when I had the chance.'_

With a tired sigh, you decide to get some sleep. It's not like the story's going to go anywhere, right? You clicked the magical 'save' button three times, to make sure it actually got it, exited out of the word processor and turned off the computer. The words 'sleepy', 'rest', and 'celibacy' seemed to ring painfully though your head until you rolled over and let your body fully relax. Seconds later you drifted off to sleep, a proud smile on your face. _'You did good, kid,'_ you thought happily, _'Just a few more paragraphs and you're done.'_

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	2. Busted

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"We need to do something about this."

"Kill her?"

"No, no, something that would attract less attention than murdering, you idiot."

"I was just trying to help."

"Anyway, we need to stop this madness of my image being sexualized into some sick fantasy," continued Sasuke as he stood over the girl as she slept in the bed, "Do you understand how upsetting it is to be portrayed as a sex go.." His eyes drifted up to give a look to the man he had came here with, Kabuto. He returned the gaze and cocked a brow.

"Go on?" Sasuke continued to give him a blank stare.

"Never mind."

"Whatever," sighed the silver-haired man, "How about we just take her with us?"

"Take her with us?" He repeated as he contemplated over the whole idea. "As in 'taking her back to our world and forcing her to live there like a prisoner so the horrible fanfiction she writes will be stopped and I-everyone else she has portrayed in such a way will be able to sleep in peace once again', Kabuto?" The 'less attractive' man could not help but give Sasuke a look of 'what an idiotic, self-centered asshat' before answering.

"No? I meant that we could just take her there and try to negotia-Hey!" Sasuke had stopped listening at the phrase 'we could', his arms scooping the girl up and over his shoulder.

"Yeah, that was what I thought we should do too," he nodded, "I'm glad you see it my way." With that, he leapt out of the open window the pair had entered through. Kabuto, pissed from being ignored by his future subject, let out a heavy sigh and cleaned up the mess Sasuke had made.

"The least he could've done is make up a letter," he huffed, "It's not that damn hard, you self-centered prick!"

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	3. Realization

"She's waking up, Sasuke," a high-pitched voice squealed.

"That's what occurs when you receive a bit of sleep, idiot," barked a deeper voice.

"There's no need to be a jackass. I was just telling him!"

The duck butt rolled his eyes and sat on the edge of the bed he had placed you in. "Hey, sleepy head," he called out sweetly, "Wake the fuck up."

Slowly, your eyes began to flutter open and a soft yawn escaped your lips. Soon enough, your hues started to focus on their surroundings. It only took a second or two to realize that: A, you weren't in your room; B, that an awesome-ass cosplay of Sasuke was hovering over your face. "Oh, hello there," you said softly, "How'd you get in?" You propped yourself on your elbows and looked around the room lazily. "Better yet, how did I get in?"

"I carried you in, dumb ass," he spat, "What do you think?" Your eyes moved over to the man, a brow rising. "Yeah?" he said in a challenging way, "Did I piss you off?" Slowly, your hand reached up to his cheek, giving it a gentle pinch. He slapped it away moments later and moved from his perch on the bed. "Fuckin' dumb ass! What'd you do that for?"

You let out a soft laugh and sat up higher in the bed. "That's so cute!" He looked over at you, confusion taking over his features. A smile plastered itself on your face as you continued. "You're even angst-y in my dreams, Sasuke look-a-like," you said sweetly, pulling off the covers and walking over to him, "So, is this a 'vision' or something silly like that? What am I supposed to learn?"

He glared and put a hand on your chest to push your back. He grunted, "I guess I will teach you how to brush your teeth. God, what have you been eating? The shit from your toilet smells better!" Sasuke ignored the hurt expression that donned itself on your face, pushing you far enough back to have you land on the bed. "Secondly, this is not a 'vision' nor is it a dream, it's payback."

You, in all your confusion, tilted your head to the side. "Payback?" you repeated, "Fer what?"

"For ruining my life, you no good sonofa.." He stopped himself from exploding, took in a deep calming breath, and smoothed down his clothing. "For ruining my life," he said, his tone seeping into something like 'proper', "That's why." The teen made his way over to your sitting figure and took a seat right beside you. With a small, forced smile, he patted your head. "Do you understand, girl?"

"Uh. No?" You pushed his hand away and wondered over to an open window. You had to admit: the dream you were having seemed oh so real. The sweet smell of pancakes seeped in from the crack in the door ( was Mother 'stress-cooking' again? ), the gentle summer breeze that blew against your skin, and the coolness of the squeaky floorboards beneath your feet only heightened the fact that the dream was..  
>"No."<p>

"'No'? What the hell do you mean 'no'?" Sasuke glared daggers at the girl by the window, his hands clenching into fists. "Do you realize how hard it is to be taken seriously anymore? I mean, for goodness sake, it was hard enough with those ingrates thinking me and that old reptile were having a thing, but you," he turned you around as he held fast onto your shoulders, "you, dear lady, made everything so much worse. I feel like a whore thanks to you! Sakura, Naruto, Kakashi, Kiba, Sai, Akamaru, Hinata, Ino-all of them you've paired me up with."

Despite having one of the most dangerous ninja bitching you out, your mind was on other things. 'H-His touch. His scent. Everything's.. This is not a dream; this whole thing-it's..'

His face twisted into a snarl. "But, no," he growled, "You didn't stop there, you scum! You went so far as to write a lie of me and my bro.. Of me and my.." Something about your face made him stop talking (thank God, huh?), made his curiosity rise. "What's with the stupid look?"

Your faced inched closer to his.

"H-Hey, what are you..?"

Your soft hands cupped his smooth face.

"This is not f-funny! Didn't you just hear a word I-Mmmph!"

His lips, despite being chapped, felt so good against yours. It was as if each of your mouths molded together perfectly. Then there was the exotic taste he had: something along the lines of 'fresh' and 'spicy'. Was it something he ate? Was it something you ate?  
>You pulled away seconds later and kept your gaze into his eyes. Slowly and calmly, you finished your internal sentence aloud. "It's.. All real," you said softly, your fingertips tracing over his lips, "All of it is what's actually happening."<p>

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**Read and Review. :3**  
><strong>Also, thank you, guys for reviewing! I truly appreciated it. <strong>  
><strong>I 'less-than-three' you! x3<strong>

**By the way, I don't own anything but the plot.  
>Oh, and the computer I've written it on.<br>Okay, that's a lie.. But you believed it, didn't you? :D**


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